admitting

I can only be me
i cannot tell you how many times i have tried to be someone else.... sometimes because i think their better.... sometimes because i think they arent being themselves good enough. i try to fill their shoes for them. I dont have to look at my own shoes that way. but what good does that do for them? or for myself? none.
i guess for a long time i thought i knew who i was. i thought i had all the answes to everything. I was my own person and no one was going to tell me how to be me... but thats just it. i wasnt being me. i was being who i thought they wanted me to be without even realizing it. looking at it now.... i dont think i could answer the question of "who are you?"
so where does that leave me? well it leaves me right here. lost. not knowing who i am. one semester of highschool left. but then what??? dont you have to know who you are to figure out what you want to do.... what you want to be??? isnt who you are the foundation of the rest??? if so then i was doing it backwards.
what do you want to be? a psychologist
do you want a family? yes. 7 kids
what else will you do? public speak
will you help the community? the world? i would hope so
yes yes i know all these answers
but i also know that hasnt always been what i wanted to do. do you think thats maybe because i dodnt have the foundation of who i am as a person???
so where do i start.....
well... right here.... admitting
admitting i am powerless. i can only be me....
now all i have to do is figure out who "me" is.....